"We fully expected to hear good news and that the treatment was a success. However, she was told the cancer had metastasised into her lung"
When Tony Donnelly brings patients to and from their cancer treatments in University Hospital Limerick as a Volunteer Driver for the Irish Cancer Society’s Transport Service, he has a deep understanding of what the families of people who are going through cancer are experiencing.
Tony lost his wife Sinead to the disease in March 2022, when she was 49 years old. Her cancer diagnosis came about after Sinead noticed a small lump in the summer of 2018.
“Sinead was referred by our GP to Breast Check in University Hospital Limerick for a precautionary breast screening. She had a lump but nothing too obvious. After the screening the Consultant sat us down and told her there was no doubt that she had breast cancer, it was absolutely devastating news to hear and to be told on the day of the screening was hard to fathom,” says Tony.
“Biopsies were taken on the day, scans were booked and we were told to come back in 2 weeks for the results and treatment plan. “
The biopsies confirmed triple negative breast cancer which is often difficult to treat. The treatment plan was discussed and Sinead started her year of chemotherapy, radiotherapy and operations. She finished her treatment in late 2019.
“Three months after she finished her initial treatment we had a follow up scan. We fully expected to hear good news and that the treatment was a success. However, she was told the cancer had metastasised into her lung."
“Sinead’s positivity, persistence and perseverance was inspiring throughout the next two years of treatment, but unfortunately the aggressive nature of TNBC just took hold and the cancer spread to various areas of the body. Although she was particularly sick, she never gave up trying.”
"Having the Support Line was a lifesaver.”
Tony and Sinead often travelled from Co. Clare to The Beacon Hospital for specialist treatment. It was on one of these occasions that Sinead took a bad turn and was admitted to the Beacon as an in-patient. It was decided that she was too unwell to travel back to UHL and was to be admitted to Harold’s Cross Hospice under palliative care.
“My mother had passed away in the care of Harold’s Cross Hospice,” says Tony. “I knew it was the absolute best place for Sinead. She passed after six days of wonderful care with our children and I by her side.”
While navigating Sinead’s diagnosis and treatment, Tony found the Irish Cancer Society’s Support Line to be a hugely beneficial resource, as the cancer nurses who staff the Support Line offered him support and advice.
“I used the Support Line on many occasions. It was really helpful to talk to an independent medical professional. When you talk to the Irish Cancer Society nurses on the Support Line, the bad scan or tough conversation with the oncologist that day doesn’t feel so terrible. They give spouses, family members, and friends of cancer patients a lot of encouragement and practical advice to support your loved one. They can talk through everything and explain symptoms and scans in layman terms. Having the Support Line was a lifesaver.”
Tony remembers: “After Sinead passed, I felt I wanted to give back in any way I could to the Irish Cancer Society. It was recommended I wait for a year before I start volunteering. I decided to apply as a Volunteer Driver for the Irish Cancer Society’s Transport Service.”
Tony gets great satisfaction from being a Volunteer Driver and enjoys meeting the clients who he brings to and from their appointments.
“The clients are always so grateful, and they think the Volunteer Drivers are marvellous, but I don’t see it that way at all. I’m not doing much – I’m just bringing them to and from their treatments in my free time.
“I’m not medically trained so I can’t help in that way, but I can drive. I was fortunate that I was in a position to bring Sinead to all her appointments but having met patients over the years not everyone was so fortunate. It’s about taking a little stress and pressure off patients going through cancer treatment.”
Tony remembers: “After Sinead passed, I felt I wanted to give back in any way I could to the Irish Cancer Society. It was recommended I wait for a year before I start volunteering. I decided to apply as a Volunteer Driver for the Irish Cancer Society’s Transport Service.”
Tony gets great satisfaction from being a Volunteer Driver and enjoys meeting the clients who he brings to and from their appointments.
“The clients are always so grateful, and they think the Volunteer Drivers are marvellous, but I don’t see it that way at all. I’m not doing much – I’m just bringing them to and from their treatments in my free time.
“I’m not medically trained so I can’t help in that way, but I can drive. I was fortunate that I was in a position to bring Sinead to all her appointments but having met patients over the years not everyone was so fortunate. It’s about taking a little stress and pressure off patients going through cancer treatment.”
"It’s a lifechanging moment not just for the patient but the families too."
“Being a Volunteer Driver is hugely rewarding. All the drivers throughout the country give that extra comfort to clients knowing they have one less thing to worry about on treatment day,” says Tony.
When asked what advice he’d have for someone who is supporting a spouse through cancer treatment, Tony says it’s important to be supportive, positive and encouraging.
“I think everyone is touched in some way by cancer. 1 in 2 of us will get a cancer diagnosis in our lifetime. Being diagnosed with cancer is very difficult thing to hear for anyone. It’s a lifechanging moment not just for the patient but the families too.
“Everybody is different, and everyone takes a cancer diagnosis differently. You just have to support them, be positive and when they’re scared and worried, put your arms around your loved one and let them know you’re there for them.”
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